CHAIRS

Go for comfort here. You're gonna be spending hours in your bate chair so make sure it's comfortable for marathon bate seshes.

You can go the traditional office chair route, pick a half decent chair to trash with your bate...

… or go the gamer chair route since they're designed for hours long gooning gaming seshes.

Or if you think you're gonna have buddies over regularly, you could even consider a couch. There are a couple strategies for maintenance:

1. Pick a fabric that's easy to clean
2. Buy yourself some big towels to put down
3. Well, it is a couch I got to sit in while I masturbate

Or go luxe: Get a comfy designer chair most people would baby but you're gonna trash. Face it dude: there's gonna be cum and grease stains all over, But you won't care— bating is what it's for!

They'll cost you tho… even fake versions tend to be pricey (think of how much porn and grease that could buy…)

Pornscreens are crucial for an immersive and captivating goon cave. You don't need anything fancy. As long as it turns on, has HDMI, and is at least 1080p, it'll work. 4K is great but can limit how many displays your computer can run depending on how powerful it is.

Computer monitors are pretty cheap from big box stores, or even better, hop on classifieds and look for companies getting rid of tech. Businesses tend to buy high quality and replace it relatively frequently (or close), so you can score some good stuff. Anything above $200 is probably not worth the increase in quality, but may be worth it for size (above 30 inches typically). Built in speakers will be hit and miss; the quality is often mid and most have no ability to control the volume from your computer, which I find annoying mid-bate.

MONITORS

TVs

TVs are great for making Porn life size. Mostly decent built in speakers mean they're ready for playing all your favorite bate tunes and Porn sounds. Most modern TVs support something called CEC, which allows connected devices to turn your screen on . This is great for BATEOMATIONs: automating your Porn machines to feed you Porn. A guide on that is in the works.

PROJECTORS

The fastest and easiest way to make Porn larger than life. Projectors offer a few perks compared to traditional TV screens, they also come with some trade-offs to consider.

For recs, check out this video/channel on YouTube.

VR

Few things are as immersive as being completely surrounded by Porn. You really can't get a feel for it until one is on your head.

While I can definitively say due to the price, I cannot recommend the Apple Vision Pro, there are a few headsets that might earn their spot in your bate cave. [List pending]

The Vision Pro quality is incredible though, so if you can find a good deal and are fine dropping that much on a device, be my bate guest!

SCREENS

PORN MACHINES

The heart (dong?) of your goon setup. And most expensive component. Picking right here is key to a device that will work for as long as possible.

KEYBOARDS + MOUSE

Pick up something cheap, you're gonna get everything greasy. No point tryin to keep them nice and clean. Trash em bro. That's what they're there for. See how long it takes until just feeling those greasy keys turns into a trigger.

DESK

Gotta have something to put your bate station together on. Make sure to take measurements of your space (and keep them in your phone so they're handy).

Drawers are handy for stashing bottles, weed, gear and toys, especially if your living situation doesn't allow you to leave them out all the time.

Standing desk, standing bate? Could be a fun experiment to change it up.

LIGHTING

Set the vibes!

Smart bulbs are great for quickly turning on bate mode, especially if they integrate with smart home scenes and automations. Some lights let you set dynamic and color changing modes

Tuck a light behind a screen for a nice backlit effect.

Pic: @scottishbator on Twitter

WATER AND SNACKS

Marathon bate seshes need some fuel (other than batefuel). Bring a snack with you to have ready, along with water. Few things hit like a post-nut snack ready to go without getting up.

I recommend a water bottle you can open with one hand for ease. I know it's trendy, but Ive got the Owala one and it's pretty great. Easy to open and lock in case it gets tipped over. Make sure to pick up a bottle and straw brush too.

SPACE HEATERS

I don’t know about you, but cold balls harsh my bate. There's nothing better than that feeling of my low hangers swinging with every pump, with a nice tug from a ball stretcher.

Adding a space heater to your bate cave is a great way to give you control over the environment. Set it to a nice temp so you're not tense from being too cold. Relax into your favorite spot in your nice warm bate cave.

THRIFT IT!

The only thing more fun than a goon cave is a goon cave built from good deals— think of how much money you'll have left over to spend on porn and bate gear.

Set alerts for Marketplace. Scour Craigslist. Check out Buy Nothing. If you live near a college, check their surplus store. (They'll probably have much older tech than businesses, but sometimes you can score a deal. Or come home with an electron microscope in dubious condition. Who knows)

Your future goon cave is out there waiting to be put together.

As your bate den comes together, you may find you spend more and more time in it, and less time doing other things. That's ok— it's what it's there for. Eventually, you may even consider selling supplies for old hobbies and using that money for expanding your goon cave. You won't regret the investment. And if you change your mind, you can always pick something up again.

Tweaking your goon cave might become a hobby of its own— building and adjusting your way to the perfect setup has a way of becoming its own reward. Having a dedicated space to grease up and worship Porn is a luxury you'll keep cumming back to again and again.